Again

BC: Bear Cat
MK: Momma Kat


Daily conversation - Again:
MK: Hi, Bear.
BC: {sigh} AGAIN?
MK: Well, I need a hug!
BC: This never would've happened if you'd listened to me to begin with! Boys are BAD, BAD, BAD! I'm a boy! I should know! Most of us don't know what we want and have no clue what we have until it's gone!
MK: I know you told me.
BC: Remember Bella? My tiny black girl cat? She came and visited me EVERY DAY for THREE YEARS!
MK: How could I forget that caterwauling every morning at five am?
BC: I sat there serenading her and giving her googly eyes through the window for a couple hours EVERY SINGLE DAY. But the couple times you let me go out to sniff her, I got scared and ran back inside! I wanted a girl cat until I actually had the chance to have one and then I was too scared! Now she doesn't stop by any more and I miss her! I didn't appreciate her and now she's gone!!!

MK: Well, to be honest, she didn't just stop coming around. She came less and less frequently until she didn't come by anymore.
BC: The result is the same! I didn't appreciate her until a couple months after she stopped coming around! Boys are stupid!!! Stupid, stupid, stupid! We don't know a good girl cat when we see one. And she came by every day for YEARS! JUST for me!
MK: I'm sorry, Bear. I wish I knew where she lived. I'd go and talk to her for you.
BC: But back to you! You didn't listen to me ... and now our blog is suffering! You haven't been visiting our friends even though they've still been coming around and have been supportive!
MK: Bear ... I can't even manage some of the most basic aspects of my day ... I can't concentrate ... my mind races or I'm depressed and I can't get a coherent thought out! But I've been pushing myself to do every single thing I can to be there for our friends too. I'm sorry for needing a day or three to catch up everywhere.
BC: Not to mention you randomly breaking out into tears! You can't even manage a decent post. No one is going to read our blog anymore if you don't figure your life out and get it together. It was bad enough when you started neglecting the blog and me to put everything in the relationship ... but it's something else entirely to ruin the blog over the relationship's demise! Sad isn't funny!
MK: I have issues.
BC: YOU'RE TELLING ME!
{Pause}
BC: {sigh} Bear hugs ... doughnuts ... crying ... moping. Sheesh. You used to be able to control EVERYTHING so completely! 
MK: Yeah, but that wasn't so good for me either.
BC: You're starting to scare me!
MK: I'm starting to scare MYSELF.
BC: You FEEL now.
MK: I'm aware. That's part of my recovery from anorexia, Bear. Not using food to manage my feelings and numb out.
BC: Ummm ... DOUGHNUTS!
MK: Err ... I meant using not eating to manage my feelings, numb out, and express my hatred toward myself. I couldn't take the pain inflicted on me by life and the people around me and I saw food as love so I rejected everything. Food (as the proxy for love). No more food symbolized no more needs for anything outside of myself.
BC: Well, THAT'S (BLEEP)ED UP!
MK: Yeah. I never said it wasn't.
BC: And you need me!
MK: Well, yeah. That's why I tell everyone that you saved me. You love me regardless. You healed the wounds inflicted by the cruelty of humanity. You gave me something to fight for when I had no desire to fight for myself. You made sure I kept laughing.
BC: I AM pretty funny. I mean, you obviously don't laugh AT me. You laugh because of my zingers and sense of humor.
MK: Err ...
BC: Now you're crying all the time. And grabbing me all the time! And the doughnuts ... NO SELF CONTROL. WHAT HAPPENED TO MY MOMMA?
MK: I got healthy and let myself live a little. I took a chance for something better and I got hurt.
BC: Ummm ...
MK: Okay, okay. Health-IER.
BC: Ummm ...
MK: {sigh} Hey, I said live a little. I never claimed to actually have a life.
BC: Food isn't love, Momma. Only love is love. And I have lots of love. I'm a purrball of love!
MK: You also have lots of claws and fangs ... which you use indiscriminately.
BC: NO. I set BOUNDARIES. You could learn the skill instead of giving everything to everyone and then wondering why you're not appreciated.
MK: What boundary were you setting last night when you came up behind me as I was standing in the kitchen, bit me on the back of the leg, and then ran off?
BC: None. That was just FUN. You should try to have some, you know.
{Pause}
BC: RATS! You tricked me. AGAIN! Every time you trick me, I should take away a cuddle!
MK: Says the cat that thinks he doesn't get enough attention.
BC: Not now! There's always a run by cuddle looming! I'm SOUND asleep and you try to gather me up into a hug and then won't let go! Get a hold of yourself woman! I've NEVER seen you this upset! NEVER. In ten years! It's like you're LOST and can't find your way anymore! I should draw a map. Hmmm. I'm going to draw you a map!!!
{Pause}
BC: YEAH! From feeling heartbroken, unlovable, unwant-able, not good enough, etc to chasing me around again like the crazy Momma you are because it's crazy fun!
MK: Will the directions include lots of Bear hugs?
BC: {sigh}.
MK: I love you, Bear.
BC: Yeah, yeah. I'm busy working on your map. I don't want to be disturbed.


Pictures of the Day:
We have some pretty incredible pictures of us cuddling. You can see the love and see the beauty of the bond we share. We're pretty lucky, right?


Featured posts of the Day:

14 comments

  1. Well now, not dat mommy's much fur havin' her foto taken, just how do ya'll get all those fotos. Mommy says she only has two hands and dat's just not enuff to work da camera and luv on us too and get in da foto. Anyways, ya'll do look pawsum together and so much luv bein shared. Dat's always a good thing. Cuz mommy says there ain't another human bein' on this planet worth dat much time and attention. Nopawdy can destroy you ifin you don't let 'em. So shake dat man boy off and lookit da pawsumness ya' have right there in your lap. Or who knows maybe he's in hims office chair, or your chair, whoevers chair it is, maybe hims there. MOL Sendin' big hugs fur both of ya', and have an extra donut fur mommy.

    Luv ya'

    Dezi and Raena

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    Replies
    1. My Momma's become the master of the timer. She uses a point and shoot where you can choose the drive speed (Continuous, 3 sec delay, 10 sec delay). Usually she's pretty hopeless when it comes to that kind of stuff but she decided that our hugs are so special she had to get a picture of them to keep forever. We appreciate all of you and our friendship.
      To no boys and more doughnuts! And a tasty whole chicken ;) ~Bear Cat

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    2. Well your mommy's is very talented. Mommy spaced out when you started talkin' 'bout drive speed. She is not a techy dat's fur sure. Everythin' we know was a happy accident. MOL Anyways, your mommy's right, your hugs are very special. Mommy wishes she had more fotos of her and sis Lexi. Least she has lots of sissy in her lap, dat's somethin'. Oh and we sent ya'll a email too. Big hugs and have a great day.

      Luv ya'

      Dezi and Raena

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    3. You've made us smile ... as you ladies always do :)

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  2. Heck, boys and doughnuts, what is it with peeps? A great post from you both, for sure.....Now just let your peep know you love her very much, morning lunch and tea time. Then in between set her onto various tasks, like ploughing and bricklaying and tending the tasty chickens. After that's been done, throw darts at Voldermort. OK there is said his name, and I am not worried in the least. purrs ERin (Princess), possessor of claws (many), teeth (quite a few more) and a large Kraken, available to hire hourly or by the ship wreck/ wizard consumed! PS tell your peep to enjoy the doughnuts, or maybe use them as target practice? :)

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    Replies
    1. I know! Why would you need boys and doughnuts when you could have Nip and tasty whole chickens? Nip and tasty whole chickens will fix ANYTHING! Hmmm ... I might need to borrow that Kraken ... I can't tell you why ... but I have IDEAS. ~Bear Cat

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  3. Yes, we can definitely see the bond you two share. It's beautiful! And Bear, I love your sense of humor and good zingers. I certainly laugh with you not at you -- most of the time anyway. :-)

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  4. Bear, don't make your Momma feel guilty for taking care of herself for awhile. We all understand and will still be here for her.

    And since you're talking about Bella, Mudpie should probably admit that she has a little neighbor boy visit her each day. His name is Milo, he's a yellow tabby, and she runs to the door each time he comes over. (Don't tell her, but he's really just here for a snack.)

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    Replies
    1. I know you're right about my Momma ... it's just kind of scary to see her so lost and discombobulated.
      It's okay. Long distance relationships are tough ... and there's nothing wrong with having friends ;) ~Bear Cat

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  5. Bear, you need to help your Momma feel better so you are going to have to be nicer for a while. She is a wonderful person and
    I know someday she will find a man ( not an immature boy) that deserves her love. And I bet you will approve of him too- maybe he will even own a sweet little lady cat :)

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    1. Thank you for being our friend. Yeah, Momma's alright ;) And I better approve! Or at least demand the tasty whole chickens UP FRONT! ~Bear Cat

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  6. We know that you are there for your Momma , Bear. We can tell by the photos that you have a special bond :) Tell your Momma to make a list of all the things she loves to do and then check something off that list every day. That might make her feel a bit better.

    the critters in the cottage xo

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